Dear Anxiety

Dear Anxiety,

You know me better than I know myself. Since I can remember, you have been alongside me wherever I go and for whatever I do. You have gripped my hand and influenced nearly every decision I have ever made. I can feel your presence envelop my body, a pain in my chest that feels more natural to me than riding a bike. I don't know what my life would be like without you screaming in my mind all day. But I have news for you: it's time for us to go our separate ways.

This breakup will not be easy. In fact, it will be one of the most difficult things I will ever do. I tried to hide you from the public as long as possible. However, there came a time when I could hide you no more, and eventually you made your entrance to the world: ugly, kicking, and screaming.

I am giving you up because I cannot care for you. I am young and need to focus on taking care of myself, my career, and my relationship. I know this will be difficult, as you will always have an influence on my life even when you are not here. But it is time to move on from the past and to be mindful of the present moment. 

Should you come back, I will not judge you. I will accept you, knowing that your visit is only temporary. I promise I will try to teach other people to accept you and to learn from you rather than to deny you and to push you away. And from these promises to you, I hope you can make a promise to me. Please try to let me move on my transition from college into the real world.

A girl who needs to learn to live 

Mental HealthPhoebe C