I recently watched Someone Great and wow, it couldn’t be more timely. Jenny’s character was spot on. It felt like I was watching my life on screen (except I wasn’t living in NYC or attending my dream school, NYU- but that’s not the point). This movie is about the pain of going through a breakup, touches on the grieving process, and the importance of closure. Throughout the movie, Jenny is looking for closure and *spoiler alert* at the end, she gets it but it’s not in the cliche way that we’d imagine in a rom-com.
I moved to Los Angeles a little less than a year ago and left all my friends back in my hometown. The relationships with friends I had known my whole life changed a lot. I wasn't as available as I once was and neither were they. I was and still am changing and growing; learning to deal with life as it comes and getting the growth I didn't get the chance to experience while living at home. One of my closest friends couldn't understand that, so she broke off our friendship. She sent me a letter explaining her feelings. I couldn't believe it. That subway scene where Jenny tells a stranger about her breakup was me, but instead of crying about a significant other it was about my best friend; someone I'd imagine would be in my life forever. It took a lot of crying, healing, and really good friends to get over that pain that I still feel here and there.
Sometimes GREAT people come into your life (romantic and platonic) but it doesn't mean that they’re going to be in it forever. Some people come into our lives to teach us a lesson, like what not to do with other friendships or to appreciate the people in our lives. No matter how much we fight for them, or cry and send them letters, nothing is going to change how they feel. Sometimes we won't get the closure we want but with great friends by our side we can get through anything.
You need to let yourself feel and validate those feelings. Sometimes that means learning to let go of someone great. When a good person leaves your life, a chapter in both your lives ends, and you learn to move on. If you’re going through it, watch Someone Great on Netflix - I guarantee it will make you feel good.
Long live the woman
A latinx, millennial women running for a seat in congress, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is someone I truly admire. Someone who looks like me? Everytime I think about it, it reminds me of everything I am capable of. Watching her transparency on social media and seeing her debate and fight for what she believes in is so motivating.
I recently watched Knock Down The House and it documents how tough campaigning is - they really don't get the credit they deserve. Especially people that are entering the race against incumbents that have been in those spots forever. The amount of rallying, fundraising and emotional labor that goes into a campaign that you don't know if you’ll win or lose is tremendous. One that’s very documented was AOC’s, who successfully campaigned against Joseph Crowley who, by the way, doesn't even live in the Bronx! You see how strong minded she has to be against a man who hasn't done anything for the district he represents.
There was a quote in the movie along the lines of ‘100 women need to try for 1 one woman to succeed’ and I believe that quote translates to all aspects of life.
As women, we are taught to be caretakers and not leaders, but are we really supposed to live our lives with men dictating our bodies? The Alabama abortion bill just passed and it has me feeling a certain type of way. Women are capable of doing anything in life and have for centuries, but with laws that don’t even give us access to birth control or proper sex education, some women are forced to stay behind. Meanwhile, men with less familial responsibility get to these leadership positions easier. Women are so resilient, so passionate, and so strong.
This documentary highlights that and leaves us thinking about how we can do more. What can we do to give back to our communities? How can we make a change? I truly believe that our generation has the power to improve our country. Even if its something small like having a conversation with someone about these topics, volunteering on the weekend or passing out flyers at local shops. We are capable of bringing that change, but the labor shouldn't fall upon just women. We need to teach our future generations from a young age that we are all equal, all capable of being leaders, and can all bring about positive change.